Stupid and Pointless Funny questions!

[Mrs. Freddy Krueger]

1. When cheese gets it’s picture taken what does it say?
2. If 4 out of 5 people suffer from diarrhea does the 5th one enjoy it?
3. Why is there an expiration date on sour cream if it’s already sour?
4. If you try to fail and succeed which have you done?
5. Why are hot pads not hot?
6. If deaf people go to court is it still called a hearing?
7. If you choke a smurf, what color does it turn?
8. If a man with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself is it a hostage situation?
9. What is the speed of dark?
10. If you stay awake all night do you still have morning breath?
11. If a turtle loses it’s shell is he homeless, naked or both?
12. Since most people don’t eat computers why is it called an Apple?
13. Can a teacher give a homeless student homework?
14. If a cop arrests a mime do they still have to tell him he has the right to remain silent?
15. Isn’t Disney World just a people trap managed by a mouse?
16. Can a vegetarian eat animal crackers?
17. If roses, lilies, and sunflowers are all flowers can you use them to make a cake?
18. What happens if a black cat carrying a rabbit’s foot crosses your path?
19. If you are innocent until proven guilty why are you arrested and sent to trial?
20. If a man speaks in a forest and no woman is around to hear him is he still wrong?

[Man in Black]

If you stay awake all night do you still have morning breath?

Yes ;D

These are all hilarious! ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D

[BellaSwan]

Here's some more... there are a few of the same ones in here, but most are different!!!


1. DON'T SWEAT THE PETTY THINGS AND DON'T PET THE SWEATY
THINGS.

2. ONE TEQUILA, TWO TEQUILA, THREE TEQUILA, FLOOR.....

3. ATHEISM IS A NON-PROPHET ORGANIZATION.

4. IF MAN EVOLVED FROM MONKEYS AND APES, WHY DO WE STILL
HAVE MONKEYS AND APES?

5. I WENT TO A BOOKSTORE AND ASKED THE SALESWOMAN,
'WHERE'S THE SELF-HELP SECTION?' SHE SAID IF SHE TOLD ME, IT WOULD
DEFEAT THE PURPOSE.

6. WHAT IF THERE WERE NO HYPOTHETICAL QUESTIONS?

7. IF A DEAF PERSON SIGNS SWEAR WORDS, DOES HIS MOTHER
WASH
HIS HANDS WITH SOAP?

9. IF SOMEONE WITH MULTIPLE PERSONALITIES THREATENS TO
KILL HIMSELF, IS IT CONSIDERED A HOSTAGE SITUATION?

10. IS THERE ANOTHER WORD FOR SYNONYM?

11. WHERE DO FOREST RANGERS GO TO 'GET AWAY FROM IT ALL?'

12. WHAT DO YOU DO WHEN YOU SEE AN ENDANGERED ANIMAL
EATING AN ENDANGERED PLANT?

13. IF A PARSLEY FARMER IS SUED, CAN THEY GARNISH HIS
WAGES?

14. WOULD A FLY WITHOUT WINGS BE CALLED A WALK?

15 WHY DO THEY LOCK GAS STATION BATHROOMS? ARE THEY AFRAID
SOMEONE WILL CLEAN THEM?

16. IF A TURTLE DOESN'T HAVE A SHELL, IS HE HOMELESS OR
NAKED?

17. CAN VEGETARIANS EAT ANIMAL CRACKERS?

18. IF THE POLICE ARREST A MIME, DO THEY TELL HIM HE HAS
THE RIGHT TO REMAIN SILENT?

19. WHY DO THEY PUT BRAILLE ON THE DRIVE-THROUGH BANK
MACHINES?

20. HOW DO THEY GET DEER TO CROSS THE ROAD ONLY AT THOSE
YELLOW ROADSIGNS?

21. WHAT WAS THE BEST THING BEFORE SLICED BREAD?


22. ONE NICE THING ABOUT EGOTISTS: THEY DON'T TALK ABOUT
OTHER PEOPLE.

23. DOES THE LITTLE MERMAID WEAR AN ALGEBRA?



24. DO INFANTS ENJOY INFANCY AS MUCH AS ADULTS ENJOY
ADULTERY?



25. HOW IS IT POSSIBLE TO HAVE A CIVIL WAR?



26. IF ONE SYNCHRONIZED SWIMMER DROWNS, DO THE REST DROWN TOO?

27. IF YOU ATE BOTH PASTA AND ANTIPASTO, WOULD YOU STILL
BE HUNGRY?


28. IF YOU TRY TO FAIL, AND SUCCEED, WHICH HAVE YOU DONE?



29. WHOSE CRUEL IDEA WAS IT FOR THE WORD 'LISP' TO HAVE
'S' IN IT?



30. WHY ARE HEMORRHOIDS CALLED 'HEMORRHOIDS' INSTEAD OF
ASSTEROIDS'?



31. WHY IS IT CALLED TOURIST SEASON IF WE CAN'T SHOOT AT
THEM?



32. WHY IS THERE AN EXPIRATION DATE ON SOUR CREAM?

33. IF YOU SPIN AN ORIENTAL PERSON IN A CIRCLE THREE
TIMES DO THEY BECOME DISORIENTED?



34. CAN AN ATHEIST GET INSURANCE AGAINST ACTS OF GOD?

[blackwidow]

30. WHY ARE HEMORRHOIDS CALLED 'HEMORRHOIDS' INSTEAD OF
ASSTEROIDS'?

31. WHY IS IT CALLED TOURIST SEASON IF WE CAN'T SHOOT AT
THEM?

These are really cool. The rest were pretty funny also.

[Man in Black]

WHY ARE HEMORRHOIDS CALLED 'HEMORRHOIDS' INSTEAD OF
ASSTEROIDS'?
;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D